Emotionally focused therapy / EFT-A02-1
Signals under the Reaction — Concept brief
Understand the idea behind signals under the reaction and consider whether it fits your context.
8 minutes · Handout · Adults; supported use as appropriate
Fictional example: Alex sounds irritated but identifies uncertainty about being included.
Use an ordinary or fictional example, with a clinician when appropriate. Visible reactions may cover more vulnerable experiences.
The idea
Visible reactions may cover more vulnerable experiences.
An ordinary example
Alex sounds irritated but identifies uncertainty about being included.
What this can look like
Separate an outward response from possible softer feelings and mark all guesses for the other person as unconfirmed.
Check the fit
What feeling can you name for yourself without assigning one to your partner? You may disagree with the framing, use fiction, or decide that this approach is not useful today.
A useful distinction
An interaction cycle is a relational map, not a way to split responsibility equally for abuse or excuse harmful behavior.
Prompts for this resource
- What part of this idea makes sense to me?
- What feeling can you name for yourself without assigning one to your partner?
Conceptual background
What is EFT? — International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy
Background on the approach only. Original exercises and wording are by More Than Therapy with AI assistance; the source does not validate or endorse these materials.