Emotionally focused therapy / EFT-A14-1
Repair after Missing a Bid — Concept brief
Understand the idea behind repair after missing a bid and consider whether it fits your context.
8 minutes · Handout · Adults; supported use as appropriate
Fictional example: Sam realizes a practical answer missed Alex's wish for comfort.
Use an ordinary or fictional example, with a clinician when appropriate. A missed moment can be acknowledged without demanding immediate forgiveness.
The idea
A missed moment can be acknowledged without demanding immediate forgiveness.
An ordinary example
Sam realizes a practical answer missed Alex's wish for comfort.
What this can look like
Draft a repair that names the missed bid, its impact, and an offered next step.
Check the fit
What can you own without telling the other person how to feel? You may disagree with the framing, use fiction, or decide that this approach is not useful today.
A useful distinction
An interaction cycle is a relational map, not a way to split responsibility equally for abuse or excuse harmful behavior.
Prompts for this resource
- What part of this idea makes sense to me?
- What can you own without telling the other person how to feel?
Conceptual background
What is EFT? — International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy
Background on the approach only. Original exercises and wording are by More Than Therapy with AI assistance; the source does not validate or endorse these materials.