Values and meaningful action / VAL-A16-3
Values in Relationships — Clinician dialogue
Guide a collaborative conversation about values in relationships while checking fit and participant choice.
15 minutes · Clinician script · Mental health professionals
Fictional example: Avery wants honesty and cannot require the other person to respond warmly.
Use within your training and assessment of readiness. A person can choose how to participate without controlling another person's values.
Invite and obtain permission
Offer: "Would it be useful to explore values in relationships using an ordinary or fictional example? We can adapt it, observe, or stop." Ask what the person wants from the conversation.
Elicit before teaching
Ask: "How does this show up, if at all, in your own words?" Offer this idea tentatively: A person can choose how to participate without controlling another person's values. Ask what fits and what does not.
Guide the task
Describe the quality you want to bring to one relationship and a boundary that protects agency. Ask for permission before giving an example. Use this fictional illustration if useful: Avery wants honesty and cannot require the other person to respond warmly.
Reflect and check accuracy
Reflect only what was offered: "I heard you describe ___. What did I miss?" Ask: What part of the relationship is yours to choose? Avoid assigning motives or interpreting silence as agreement.
Respond to a mismatch
If the person rejects the frame, say: "Thank you for correcting it. What would be more useful?" Return to their language or choose a different approach.
Close with agency
Ask which observation, question, or support request the person wants to keep. Confirm a manageable ending and appropriate follow-up; do not turn a tentative possibility into a homework obligation.
Prompts for this resource
- Readiness, permission, cultural context, and access needs to check:
- What part of the relationship is yours to choose?
- What would tell me to adapt, stop, or seek supervision?
Conceptual background
Valuing as a Choice — Association for Contextual Behavioral Science
Background on the approach only. Original exercises and wording are by More Than Therapy with AI assistance; the source does not validate or endorse these materials.