Use this conversation when a client wants something to change but has been postponing or avoiding a safe activity. Begin by understanding what the behavior does for them. Permission and shared choice remain central throughout.
Understand the protection
Clinician: "Would it be okay to look at what happens when this task comes up?" Client: "I keep putting it off." Clinician: "What does putting it off help you avoid or manage in that moment?" Reflect the answer before considering change: "It gives you a break from the fear of criticism."
Explore cost and choice
Clinician: "What does that relief cost you later, if anything?" If the client says there is no cost: "Then we may have a different priority today. What would be useful?" If they want change: "What is the smallest safe step that would move toward what matters to you?"
Protect autonomy
If the client says, "I am not ready," respond: "We can pause. Would understanding the barrier, finding support, or choosing another goal be more helpful?" If they choose practice, agree on a specific step and ask, "What will we learn even if anxiety shows up?"
Reflection prompts
Use these questions in conversation, on paper, or in the downloaded PDF. You may adapt or skip a prompt.
- Client language to reflect and the next choice we agreed on